Future Tense by Billboard Vagabond

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The Red Devils Renaissance

The match ended yesterday with Manchester United winning 4-0 against the bottom- placed club Norwich City and we’ve heard it way too often this season. Have United finally turned a page, is this the real United, can United churn up such performances every week, does United have the consistency for the season? The first season under Ole was nothing to write home about since we ended up sixth but the start was promising. Sir Alex Ferguson(SAF) has left a void that a few have tried to fill with abysmal results. SAF’s shoes are hard to fill. Ask David Moyes, Louis Van Gaal and Jose Mourinho.

The way Ole Gunnar Solskjaer has handles the team is admirable. Keeping Pogba in check, till now, or for that matter his signings and their performances in the first season. Rumour has it that we might just be able to sign the Sporting Lisbon enigma, Bruno Fernandez as well in the next few days before the January transfer window closes. Aron Wan Bissaka and Harry Mcguire are an integral part of the back four and Daniel James is performing not as consistently as one would like but kudos to money well spent.

Liverpool will win the Premier League in a canter with a 16 point lead at the top but it is imperative that given United’s stature, a top-four finish is a must. The fight for the top four is all the more intriguing given the usual suspects and Leicester City in the mix. Chelsea and Arsenal have taken a leaf out of United’s book by giving Frank Lampard and Mikel Arteta the reigns respectively for different reasons. United have a fair chance because they are only five points adrift of Chelsea in fourth right now. It could be anybody’s game, pun intended.

To complete or compete with the squad, United need replacements for Fellaini who left for China and Ander Herrera who left for Paris Saint Germain. In my opinion, Andres Perreira, Tahith Chong, Angel Gomes, Jesse Lingard are squad players at best and although youngsters are being given their due, a lot is left to be desired. Brandon Williams has been a revelation this season, both, with his defence and offence as an able foil to Luke Shaw.

If Pogba stays and United can get some sort of a run to win some silverware then this season can be termed a success. Otherwise, Ole would be in the best position to take a call on what the next steps might be. Mike Phelan, Michael Carrick and Nicky Butt are experienced hands as backroom staff. Tweaking is required of the transferred business to weed out the Darmians, Depays, Schneiderlins etc. I am an optimist and then a realist when it comes to supporting the club that I love. If not for me, then Ole has to do it for my son.

Ole, Ole Ole Ole, Ole!

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12 Strong

This is a pending movie review considering nowadays it belongs to my reading when I can find the time and this is your quintessential war movie. If you’re in it for the thrills and spills, strong language, explicit action sequences with missiles and horses in the same frame then you won’t be disappointed. Not to mention, the ladies can feast their eyes on Mr Macho himself aka Chris Hemsworth. The movie is also helped by the fact that it is based on a true story and furthers the American perspective of the war on terror.

Chris Hemsworth, 9/11, Afghanistan, war on terror, Michael Shannon, Michael Pena, Green Berets, Jerry Bruckheimer — 12 Strong

The movie is stupendously shot thanks to the effervescent producer Jerry Bruckheimer who knows a thing or two about action movies from his heyday. The movie is based on the first retaliation by America against the 9/11 attacks by sending the Green Berets led by the new Captain Mitch Nelson portrayed by Chris Hemsworth ably supported by an effective star cast including Michael Shannon and Michael Pena where the team has to take the help of the Afghan Warlord General Dostum in order to pave the way for the conventional warfare which was to follow in its aftermath.

Definitely a one time watch for the adrenaline junkies and if you want to see repercussions of the sophisticated type against the mindless terror that takes shape across the world from fanatics driven by the unthinkable.

1917

For the uninitiated, this is a movie review of 1917 and this movie got several accolades along the way including the nod for best Director for Sam Mendes. The movie has been shot in a single shot with an estimated budget of $100 million and a worldwide gross of $150 million approximately. The movie is visually stunning with great camera work and a story line that easily blends into the picture. Not to mention, war movies are a preferred genre and since this revolves around world war one, it makes it all the more interesting.

The story is in the middle of world war one where Lance Corporal Blake played by Dean-Charles Chapman takes with him Lance Corporal Schofield played by George MacKay and the two of them are entrusted with passing on a message to a platoon of 1,600 men at a distance who are ready to attack, to not do so since it was a trap. To add a twist to the tale, Blake is also trying to save his elder brother who is a part of the platoon.

The movie has garnered three Oscars and several other nominations and awards and has a rating of 8.5/10 on IMDB(Internet Movie Database).Watch the rest of the movie and form your opinion if you like such stories.

Bombshell

If you’ve been following my blog then it would be no surprise to you that this is another movie review by yours truly. Unfortunately, the film falls short of expectations given the premier star cast even though it could have been a hard-hitting movie. Please don’t take me as an MCP(Male Chauvinist Pig) but somehow women empowerment movies still have a long way to go. Disclaimer – I appreciate women all the more after having married an independent lady who is a mother to my kid and who contributes to the household income by working for the government.

First, the star cast and then the story. The movie has Charlize Theron who portrays the character of Megyn Kelly ably supported by Nicole Kidman who plays the role of Gretchen Carlson and Margot Robbie as Kayla Pospisil and all three of them are working for Fox News at the height of Trump’s first election campaign with the US divided between conservatives and liberals.

This is the story of how the three women with support from other women colleagues take down Roger Ailes who is the head honcho of Fox News who has built the company into a behemoth contributing a third of the revenue for Fox Network under the leadership of Rupert Murdoch.

Being a professional and a man, there is a fine line during professional and personal space respectively that one needs to tread in order to be in the safe zone when it comes to sexual overtures to the fairer sex. Sexual harassment policies are commonplace now incorporate culture and instances such as the film and media exposure to misdemeanours towards women is being given due coverage and importance. Being an Indian and being a part of a patriarchal society does give rise to misogynist tendencies. Incidents in the not too distant past have cast a dark shadow over the country but I hope too that we “progress” towards more meaningful existence of the girl child and give due respect to women in the workplace.

Ps- My mother gave more than 35 years to the banking industry and held court over several ups and downs which is something that I want my wife also to follow up with to drive home the point.

Phantom Thread

This is a movie review keeping in mind that Valentine’s Day is another week away and continuing from where I left my last blog, this movie is as romantic as can be with great actors and Paul Thomas Anderson as the director. I think, Daniel Day-Lewis is hotter as Reynolds Woodcock compared to Vicky Krieps as Alma in a strictly non-gay way or it could have helped had Paul given more importance to Alma’s beauty in a strong non-sexist way. Sure, Daniel Day-Lewis’s body of work far exceeds Vicky’s but that just adds to the notion.

The film is set in 1950’s London with Reynolds as a successful designer with an upmarket clientele whose life is a routine with painstaking scenarios until he lays his eyes on Alma the waitress who is a strong-willed woman in her own right and how the two of them fall in love. Define irony? Writing a review for Phantom Thread and I have a Google add competing for my screen space with Kate Hudson as the star of the “movie” Dubai and for me, Kate Hudson would always be the heroine of How To Lose A Guy IN 10 Days. That just about wraps it up for me. Hope I can do something without the roses come to D-Day.

Marriage Story

This is a movie review cum confession cum dedication towards the Valentine Day weekend coming up in part or at least in preparation of it. At 38(almost there), the definition of a romantic comedy and Feb 14 doesn’t really rhyme so this portion is dedicated to the movie about how a marriage breaks up and a family stays together, eventually with amazing portrayals by the star cast and brilliant direction by Noah Baumbach. It has been released in select theatres and is available on Netflix.

To bring a diary entry context to it, I had been obsessed ever since I got married three years back with the concept of divorce considering how much my parents used to bicker and be physically abusive which has defined me to an extent towards the person I am today. But going by this movie’s depiction of divorce proceedings or how much it entails when it comes to the process workflow of separation, it puts a spanner in the works when you think of taking the divorce step.

Noah Baumbach has expertly captured the scenes with the intricate details and the emotional turmoil that the couple, played by Scarlett Johansson and Adam Driver, go through. Laura Dern and Ray Liotta are the lawyers for the couple standing against each other. So what is the moral of the story you might ask? In a lighter vein, divorce is expensive, ask Jeff Bezos.

Uncut Gems

This is a movie review by the same name and the plot really isn’t rocket science when you have the protagonist as a hustler, gambler and jeweler in the same sentence. Rest assured, the movie is an interplay of characters slowly but surely building up to a crescendo and before I let out the ending, I would rather you watch it.

Adam Sandler is Howard Ratner, a Jewish Jeweler in New York who hustles and gets deep in debt and has to continuously raise the stakes by betting desperately at times. Julia Fox as his employee and keep also plays the part but the coup de grace is having Kevin Garnett and the Weeknd as a part of the film to give it more relevance to the story and the hustling. Safdie brothers as the directors are given ample leeway to express but somehow the anxiety and stress are missing from the story.

This movie automatically reminded me of The Gambler given the similarities in the storyline and the portrayal when push comes to shove. Uncut Gems could have a lot more chutzpa as the narrative could have been more. Don’t take my word for it.

5 Steps To A Voice Over Homestudio

The reason for writing this blog is to share how anyone reading this can set up a voice-over home studio for less than 7k INR(Indian Rupees) or less than $100 USD in five easy steps which is what I did. This is hoping that you would already have access to a laptop which would be able to download free software and a decent set of headphones for listening. Please understand that you would require a condenser microphone which would connect to an audio interface which in turn would connect to the laptop through a USB and the laptop would have pre-loaded software.

Senheiser headphones which cost around Rs 1,500($21) are a prerequisite if you watch movies on your laptop or want to listen to songs even if you don’t want to set up a home studio. It is essential to have a 3.5 mm to 6.35 mm audio jack for Rs 240($3.36) because the headphones otherwise would not connect to the equipment that I am referring to in this article.
A laptop would come handy which has a configuration about 8 GB RAM, MS Windows 7 or beyond and which could download software such as Audacity also known as Digital Audio Workstation (DAW) which is free, to record, edit, improvise on soundtracks, is the most popular and has an easy interface. Shotcut is a video editing free software which requires time getting used to and you might need it when it comes to voice-overs for animation or video.
The Behringer U-PHORIA UM2 is an audio interface which converts the analogue signal from the microphone to the compatible digital signal of the laptop which could be represented as waveforms on the software such as Audacity or Shotcut. This device requires an XLR cable for Rs 325($4.54) to provide phantom power to a condenser microphone for it to function properly.
A condenser microphone is required for a professional sounding voice which could be interpreted and treated via an audio interface and a laptop which could record the audio sample in a digital format such as mp3. I got this along with a stand and a plastic shock mount for Rs 1,900($26.56).
A Pop Filter is essential to eliminate “p” sounds such as “pop” or hisses and also to prevent saliva from spoiling the mic. It should be installed at a distance between 2″ and 6″ from the mic. It would cost you Rs 250($3.50)

With the aforementioned things in mind and a little tweaking according to your liking, you can set up and soundproof your room for a professional sounding experience. Soundproofing could be done with Isolation Shields depending on your budget or pocket.

Happy recording!

Once Upon a Time In…Hollywood

Yes, this is a review of the movie by the same name which in recent times has been nominated for 10 Oscars and when the tagline of a movie states that it is the ninth film by Quentin Tarantino then I have two words for you, enough said. Quentin has come a long way from his Reservoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction days but still commands the romance and the respect every time he comes up with his rendition of a story on 70mm. This time is a homage to the golden age of Hollywood in the late sixties.

With a who’s who star cast that includes Brad Pitt, Leonardo Di Caprio, Al Pacino, Margot Robbie, Dakota Fanning, Kurt Russell and Luke Perry the film has grossed upwards of $350 million worldwide. Rick Dalton is a faded TV star played by Leonardo Di Caprio who has a stunt double Cliff Booth played by Brad Pitt and how the two of them embark on contrasting journeys to acquire fame and fortune, not literally, while they can. The movie by Hollywood standards is long at two hours and 41 minutes but is enjoyable and has scored high(7.8) on IMDB. Watch it for what it is worth.

Joker

You don’t have to be Einstein to guess this is a review or better still, a tribute to the Joker which in recent times has been a path breaker for DC Comics as a “villain” outshining several heroes in the midst. Certainly, when it comes to box-office returns. Movies are a part of me as much as sugar is a part of tea and this was an exception since I watched it in a hall with a handful of people for company by starting early from office at around 10 in the night and watching it at 11 near my house. Not to mention, I could have streamed it, downloaded it or watched a DVD in case I had the option but the movie had the right kind of buzz for me to follow suit.

With a star cast that includes Joaquin Phoenix and Robert De Niro in the same frame would in itself be meat but that is just the starters to hook you in. Arthur Fleck is a guy with mental problems in Gotham City who is mistreated and disrespected by the society at large when he is trying to make a living the hard way. The easy way is another story altogether for another time though. This is when there is a resurgence of sorts by Arthur in a downward spiral replete with crime and anarchy which makes him come to terms with his alter-ego, Joker which could be an extension of him playing the part of a stand up comic during struggles in Gotham city.

Incredible storytelling by Todd Phillips and negativity never felt so good. Nominated for 11 Oscars and reminiscent of a couple of lines from Counting Stars by One Republic which states,

“I, feel something so right, Doing the wrong thing
I, feel something so wrong
But doing the right thing”

Grade place for kids

The only thing constant is change and for my child to step into a toddler from an infant has brought about its own set of problems. Not willing to put in the towel, I have decided, god willing, to get my son admitted in school at the ripe old age of two and a half years(almost three) fraught with its own trials and tribulations.

Son, school admissions — School Admissions 2020

The stipulation from the government of Delhi regarding school admissions is that on the 31st of March, the child needs to be three and a half years old but a leeway of 45 days can be provided which is what my son falls under. Despite the government directive, some schools have refused to accept the admission form which is a precursor to the admission process itself. Fair enough, the rest of the schools that I had applied for did not admit my son when the first lists were announced for all the schools. Points are given on several different factors such as parents bein an alumnus, distance from the house, elder siblings being in the same school etc. Unfortunately, my son did not get through because he was not able to garner the requisite points. Some learned people have told me that the cut off went at 55 points.

Several well-wishers have also warned, suggested, cajoled me by stating that I should wait for another year before I admit my son in school. The only dichotomy being that if Perke(son) is admitted this academic year then he would be the youngest in the class and if I postpone the admission to next year then he would be the oldest in the class. In addition, my greatest fear is that my son has to complete his education inclusive of a post-graduation, get a job and marry before he is 28 years. Otherwise, god forbid, if he turns up bi-polar like his dad then I am not sure if he would be capable of anything with all due respect considering my mind went for a toss and only I know how much I have struggled with the burden of my genes. Sorry, mom. Another way of looking at it is that my son watches so many cartoons in such varied languages such as French, Russian, Chinese, English, etc. thanks to my dad who spoils him silly, Perke can’t come up with two straight sentences in English let alone make a conversation which is a pity. If Perke continues in the same vein for another year with his mobile, tablet and TV it could very well be another worst-case scenario.

The reason why I got down to jotting my thoughts is that for the fourth or fifth time somebody, my neighbours in this instance, suggested again that it was too early to think about Perke’s admission. With this predicament in mind, I will leave you with a quote from Hamlet,” To be, or not to be, that is the question: Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer. The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, Or to take arms against a sea of troubles.”

French 101

The reason for not having written in the last three and a half months is the reason why I’m typing this blog. Hopefully, the means justify the end. I learnt French again at Alliance Francaise in Delhi after having done it for six years in school. Knowledge is one thing that can be never taken away from you and so it seemed.

Being an Indian and a bonafide Punjabi makes me want to emigrate to Canada. For this reason alone, I had a like-minded friend/colleague for company in the office called Nadir. Now, Nadir is the primary applicant for emigrating to Canada and knowing French would be a plus point. This is when he saw me learning French on Duolingo, an app for the uninitiated which helps in learning different languages. So he told me that I should join him in learning French with an added incentive that the crowd is really good for bachelors and married men alike and it would be good fun.

We went to Alliance to register for the course and got to know that the fee would be 27k for the duration of the course which I thought was reasonable and would add to my application for Canada being the secondary applicant. Besides, nothing could go wrong in terms of learning the language as I had already done it in school and it would be more of a refresher course.

The day that I came to pay the fee was when Nadir decided to put in his papers because he wanted to go back to Bangalore to his dad who was alone. (For the record, he is currently working in Bangladesh in the Oil & Gas sector after shifting his loyalties from Information Technology). In addition, I got to know that there were no additional points for the secondary applicant even if he knew French as an additional language. That left me as the oldest person in the class of 21 at Alliance Francaise at 37(there were a couple of guys in their 30s but I was the oldest by a long shot).

This also led to a WhatsApp group named till today – “Celibataire + 1 Marie gang”(Singles + 1 married gang) which kept me on auto mode 24*7 because I was putting nine hours each on weekends including the time spent travelling, also, with hardly any time left to do anything else.

Now that you have had your kicks at my expense, hopefully, this should translate to more expressions of the ilk via this medium. Au revoir!

7 Movies On Netflix India Worth Watching

This instalment of the best movies on Netflix India is in continuation of the previous blog and I would like to point out that it is not a random exercise. I have a list of all the movies that I have watched till now and I am sifting through the best of the lot for your viewing pleasure alone. So here goes:-

Baby Driver

Baby Driver – With an innocuous outlook or a first impression about the movie, I still watched it only because of its loaded star cast with the likes of Jamie Foxx, Kevin Spacey, Jon Hamm, Ansel Elgort etc. The movie is worth its while as a popcorn flick with no strings attached and rates as 67 on the all-time top 100 in Rotten Tomatoes.
Lust Stories – This Hindi movie with an adult outlook looks at sexuality in different shades. The reason why I have it as my best Hindi movie on Netflix is that it is a rendition by four contemporary directors of repute and since it is about four short stories so you don’t have to labour through it. A compliment where its due in the film is the character of Bhumi Pednekar who redefines the maid in MADE.
Shot Caller – It is your quintessential larger than life hero played by Nikolaj Coster-Waldau building on his Game of Thrones exploits as a recently released prisoner who is forced by his gang to commit a felony against a rival gang in California. Loved it!
The Gambler – If you ever watch The Gambler and I suggest you should is you’ll know the reason why Mark Wahlberg was the highest-paid actor in the world till 2017. Sorry about no updates about the current standings. Jim Bennett is the gambler who is at the wrong end of the stick with nothing going right for him including his hormones(Literature professor confused with his student) and how it “raises” the tagline – “The only way out is all in”
Whisky Tango Foxtrot – This is a woman’s perspective adapted from the book “The Taliban Shuffle: Strange Days in Afghanistan and Pakistan by Kim Barker played by Tina Fey with a few others for a company not to mention Margot Robbie. Very funny, has to be watched, girl power, 21st century. Hopefully not sounding like an M.C.P(Male Chauvinist Pig)
Her – Joaquin Phoenix as Theodore is a lonely writer who falls in love with an Operating System without realizing the repercussions and is not to be missed for the portrayals and the voice-over of Scarlett Johansson. As a story, something we can all look forward to as a part of our future.
Hell or High Water – Another movie that ranks high on both IMDB and Rotten Tomatoes is the western Hell or High Water about a man who is divorced and his elder brother out of prison who desperately try and save their west Texas ranch from foreclosure by the bank. Great star cast including Chris Pine, Ben Foster and Jeff Bridges.

Catch-22

A book review of Catch-22 is a difficult proposition but something I might as well try because of this gem of a book cannot go unnoticed without an opinion. It is a satirical work of fiction by Joseph Heller who creates Yossarian in the middle of a battle between 1942-1944 dring World War 2. There are many who have stopped mid-way through reading it and find it difficult to finish it but I am not one of those. I have read a few in my time and am planning to gift my son a collection that I am building for him through Amazon’s 100 best reads and I can safely say that this book is definitely a part of it.

John Yossarian the protagonist finds himself in the middle of the war spectacle and tries to provide perspective filled with humor towards the inadequacies of the theatre, the perpetrators from both the sides, the bureaucracy or even God himself. The following is an excerpt from the book to drive home the point.

“Don’t tell me God works in mysterious ways,’ Yossarian continued, hurtling on over her objection. ‘There’s nothing so mysterious about it. He’s not working at all. He’s playing. Or else He’s forgotten all about us. That’s the kind of God you people talk about – a country bumpkin, a clumsy, bungling, brainless, conceited, uncouth hayseed. Good God, how much reverence can you have for a Supreme Being who finds it necessary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His divine system of creation? What in the world was running through that warped, evil, scatological mind of His when He robbed old people of the power to control their bowel movements? Why in the world did He ever create pain?’
‘Pain?’ Lieutenant Scheisskopf’s wife pounced upon the word victoriously. ‘Pain is a useful symptom. Pain is a warning to us of bodily dangers.’
‘And who created the dangers?’ Yossarian demanded … ‘Why couldn’t he have used a doorbell instead to notify us?”

MUST-READ, Thoroughly Enjoyable!

Bohemian Rhapsody

It’s been more than a year that the movie was released and I for one have conflicting thoughts about it. I wanted to start off by giving it a heading called, “fall in love again” but then I juxtapose with the lead character Freddie Mercury and I am left bemused. First, the positives, the recreation of a bygone era replete with characters/ superstars of a bygone era is second to none and Rami Malek deservedly got the Oscar nod. The music is what binds the story together because if you were born in the early eighties like me then it would have been difficult to miss Queen no matter which part of the earth you belonged to. There is a realism involved in the narrative since even when Freddie Mercury was alive, he led a very colorful life which wasn’t helped by his promiscuous tendencies, his cross-dressing and his larger than life persona. The musical journey transcends a bygone era culminating with Live Aid Concert for Africa and the band reuniting after a lot of upheavals brought about by personal ambition and greed overtaking artistic compulsions.

The negatives would primarily be based on his sexual escapades considering Freddie was unabashedly gay who had his fair share of flings but then who am I to judge. Not too much to critique since the movie is a celebration and should be enjoyed as such. Whether you are homophobic or a Queen hater, you cannot miss it as it is a gem.

Fine Dining And An Anniversary

There aren’t too many special occasions that we as a family go out of our way to celebrate but the one exception to the rule is when it comes to my anniversary. It gives us an excuse to dine out in the capital(Delhi) and I am yet to be disappointed with eating out considering it was only our third anniversary that we were celebrating. A good month before the celebration, we were watching an old episode of Master Chef India on Hot Star with my Mom when we came across the Judge Zorawar Kalra’s restaurant Pa Pa Ya. Chef Sahil Singh who was competing with a contestant had won a round in Master Chef. Sahil Singh outperformed the contestant in the face-off and as an icing on the cake, Zorawar asked him to include the winning dish in his restaurant menu. Needless to add, that was all the inspiration I was looking for. Need to give credit where it’s due by mentioning that Zorawar Kalra under the aegis of his company Massive Restaurants is slowly but surely changing the face of fine dining across the country which is no surprise why he had made it as a judge in season five of Master Chef.

Just for trivia sake, I might add that out that the first anniversary was also at a Zorawar Kalra restaurant, Masala Library By Jiggs Kalra named after his father. Pa Pa Ya is situated in the chic mall Saket Select City Walk and as an introduction is an Asian Bistro with typical offerings from all across the region including but not limited to Thai, Chinese, Japanese, etc. The ambiance is grand and the restaurant is nicely done with a well-equipped bar catering to every taste bud.

One of the USPs of the place is the not to be missed Sunday Brunch and reservations are recommended. The price scales up beyond 2k per person depending on the kind of alcohol that one might fancy. Another point to note for young couples like me who have toddlers or babies is that the restaurant is accommodating with children less than 10. The food on offer is quintessential Asian fare which leaves you wanting for more even if it’s brunch. We started with the restaurant namesake Papaya Salad which was a novelty followed by a starter called Chicken with Thousand Chillies. This was followed by Jigae Chicken soup which was average. There was an unlimited serving of Dim Sums and Sushi and I ate till my heart’s content. There were also generous helpings of the following as well such as Sliced Braised Chicken, Ching Mai Curry Shrimp, Peking Duck which was tender and alluring, Yaki Udon Noodles, Khao Pad Kar Pao and to top with a dessert called Chocolate Ball on fire.

Pa Pa Ya can be reserved for special occasions especially if you have a penchant for Asian delicacies and I am glad that my better half and my son were able to enjoy to the hilt as well.

The Ultimate Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy

It’s been ages since I read this one and my primary focus would be to do it justice as a book review because I thoroughly enjoyed it while reading. Absurd is a premise well associated with the book which eventually translates to the ‘understatement of the decade.’ Consider this as a start, right before the earth is about to be demolished before making way for a galactic freeway, Arthur Dent is saved by Ford Prefect who is a researcher and together they commence their journey through the stars and planets with each supposition more ludicrous than the next though with the underlying theme which still makes us human and our day to day activities that keep our suppositions and our opinions for granted.

Douglas Adams, Arthur Dent, Ford Prefect, — The Ultimate Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy

The entire novel is a volume which has six parts to it namely:-

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
The Restaurant at the End of the Universe
Life, the Universe, and Everything
So Long, and Thanks for all the Fish
Mostly Harmless
Young Zaphod Plays it Safe

The genre it belongs to is sci-fi and if you’re in it then you’ve probably read it till now but if not then try and get through the first installment and if the humor about God, marketing professionals, warmongers, philosophers, scientists, political leaders, etc doesn’t get to you then Douglas Adam’s with would surely as a writer par excellence and you wouldn’t find it a drag. Highly recommended.

Two Nights And I Might

This actually happened with me a month or so back and the only word that I can equate it to is Utopia for there is nothing else that a man can ask for between his wants and desires. My shift is from 5:30 pm till 2:30 am since we cater to the Eastern Time Zone and when I want to unwind after a hard day then we go to a hotel called Park Plaza, in the vicinity for booze and revelry at Melange which is their bar. Names and referral points are being changed but this is based on a true story.

Melange, Park Plaza, Vincent, Chris, Saket Jha, British Airways Cabin Crew, — 2 Nights And I Might

Vincent is a former colleague with whom I no longer talk because of what transpired but we used to hit it like a house on fire since we shared similar tastes in sports, movies, booze and brotherhood. We were on a hiatus and hadn’t been talking when he gave me a buzz and said,”lets catch up.” My obvious reply was to go for it even though I was selling myself short in terms of the work hours but since Vincent was coming from the other side of town, I gave it a miss to the last couple of hours on a Wednesday. We met in the car park when he told me that he thought that he owed me a session with booze in tow considering he had got back to drinking after ages albeit for a short while. So off we went to Melange in the vicinity to get tipsy or tend to tipsy. Started with our pints and lit our smokes when a guy who had been drinking for a while from the looks of it called out to Vincent to exchange pleasantries. Vincent being the “sport” that he is went along and before I knew it, the two of them were jostling for a game of one-upmanship which is typical of Delhi lads where putting down the other person overrides the premise of a conversation. Later did I get to know that Vincent was talking to a certain Saket Jha who was a Bihari(one of the backward states in India but can’t say it for Saket. More on that later). The conversation veered towards girls and sluts in particular with Saket boasting and Vincent giving him just the right kind of encouragement while Saket was slurring and swaying. We were joined by another gentleman who was a British Airways cabin crew from whom there was a ready supply of apparently Brit cigarettes JPS. Eduardo also joined in considering we were the only blokes around and it was a favour to the waiters on call since now the waiters only had to serve one table. Eduardo had the audacity of proclaiming in the middle of the conversation in the midst of Indians in the middle of India that the only reason why Indians were good in English was because we had been colonized by the British which was ironic considering it came from a Swiss bloke.

We had spent a good couple of hours by now, enjoying the Champions League semi final between Liverpool and Barcelona even though we are Man United supporters. There was a steady stream of alcohol which was inadvertently sponsored by Saket who kept boasting about his lineage and his spending power. I met Vincent in the loo to ask him because I was surprised that he was trying to enjoy a conversation with a perfect stranger and he was till trying to put him down even though he was sponsoring the drinks to which Vincent replied that for him it was always about taking someone’s case especially if he was asking for it which made me a silent spectator and a happy free loader. By this time, Chris and Lilly also came by to give us company after finishing work at the office and it was around four am. The conversation veered towards the unpredictable when suddenly, Vincent refused to keep shut and Saket got really annoyed and Saket removed his shoe to come across to Vincent to hit him with it. I thought it was a bit too far fetched and wouldn’t materialize when Chris butted in saying that Saket couldn’t do it or he wouldn’t let him do it since Vincent was like an elder brother to Chris. Saket walked up to Vincent across the table with his shoe in his right hand to strike Vincent with Chris about to intervene and Saket bends down and kisses Vincent on his lips! I almost puked being homophobic by nature and unfortunately I was the only one watching which was a cross between a snog and a depiction of appreciation. I thought this night couldn’t get any worse being in a sausage fest with only Lilly for a chick when Saket rattled off about carrying plenty of cash. Vincent encouraged him by questioning how much did he have and would he put it on the table.

Saket in his stupor puts USD 1500 on the table and Vincent picks it up to admire or count it which is when Saket says, “keep it” to Vincent. Vincent offered to return it to him a couple of times and Saket refused. Vincent nonchalantly walks away with the cash and Saket calls his chauffeur which I realized later because he left in an Audi A6 five minutes after that. Vincent, Chris and Lilly partied their guts out at another location while I was still taken aback with what had happened and I left for my place.

The next day brought its own trials and tribulations with Vincent jogging his memory and trying to find out Saket which was the right thing to do so he asked me for a favour if I could check again at Melange for him. The next night after office i warned the Manager at the bar to notify me if he sees Saket again because he had left a wad of notes with a person who was drinking with me. Chris also joins in later and there is a group of four women and a guy drinking at the next table, who we later realized were the British Airways Cabin Crew including the pilot and we drank our share. The bar was about to close so the women wanted to go out for a smoke and one of them walks by looking at us and she has a tattoo on her thigh and I say, “Nice tattoo” while Chris says simultaneously, ” Nice tat”. I followed up and asked for a cigarette when she invited us outside while Chris was busy taking her snapshots of the two thighs with her tattoos on it. We continued the conversation outside and I declared at the outset that I had a wife and kid to go home to and I wouldn’t bother them too much. Ronnie offered the smokes and started chatting like there’s no tomorrow. She offered us the role of guides for them as tourists to find out the “real India” even though the others were skeptical and refused but Chris wanted to be a part of it and I said no. Ronnie talked about her difficult childhood and the sacrifices her father in particular had made to bring her up while Chris asked me in Hindi if he should bang her tonight. In the middle of the conversation, seeing Ronnie getting sentimental, I started singing “Wonderwall” by Oasis and the three of us started singing. The others had left by this time and she also talked about her favourite Welsh band Stereophonics. All said and done, she invited me for drinks in her room and I politely refused. The next day, Chris thanked me and acknowledged my contribution by stating that if it wasn’t for me, Ronnie was impressed by my mannerisms and communication skills, he wouldn’t have slept with her later. I replied,”Anytime, every time”

A Star Is Born

I’d like to begin the review of the movie, ” A Star Is Born” with a couple of different comparisons with the common denominator being the Oscars and those are:-

1. A Star Is Born is a musical odyssey in the fiction genre which will dominate this year’s ceremony common with the biographical Bohemian Rhapsody( more on it in a separate review) with the lead actors justified for being in the limelight for their respective performances.

2. This year’s Oscars are an exception because a few of the contenders are actually mass acclaimed movies rather than only critical acclaim such as Black Panther.

Now, to begin a movie review by harping on the Oscars can bring its own pitfalls but allow me the indulgence considering I was taken in by the Oscar mania and this should’ve come out a long time ago to coincide with the ceremony par excellence for the movie going audience. This is the fourth remake of a story having been told to earlier generations as well and Bradley Cooper took a multitude of roles in this one by acting, co-writing, producing and singing in it.

Bradley Cooper, Lady Gaga, Jackson Maine, Ally — A Star Is Born

The story is about a popular country singer Jackson Maine played by Bradley Cooper, who has a penchant for his booze and whose career graph is receding even though he’s been playing to packed houses on his country tour when he comes across the hotel waitress Ally played by Lady Gaga who is a part time singer as well. Jackson is blown away with her voice and the movie plays out a contrasting graph of her careers along with their love/married life. Jackson Maine is a complex character portrayal with a self destructive tendencies with his drunken stupor with a cocktail of drugs while in the spotlight with Ally who has her own issues with her nose and a burgeoning following towards stardom. A point to note which would be hard to miss by anybody watching the movie is the soundtrack which enhances the movie going experience manifold asking for more. Given the chemistry that the lead actors enjoyed while filming and during post production, the audience was taken in by their respective personas and were disappointed to know that the two leads in fact enjoyed healthy relationships and were not romantically involved which was a pity.

Definitely worth watching for the coming of age of Lady Gaga as an actor in a lead role and the multi tasking attributes of Bradley Cooper.

This Country Is Going To The Dogs

Elections around the corner,

Promises being doled out in plenty,

Country caught up in a world wind of stories,

Is it really worthy of my time, am I getting senti?